Ok so I have become a vegan for various reasons including damage to the environment. 
I am all for spreading the message but struggle when I see some vegans shout and parade about the fact that they can sleep at night knowing they did not hurt a living being is something that bothers me. 
I will tell why shortly……

First let me say that I think that the lines between spreading the word about why it’s good to be a vegan versus being self righteous about it are blurred. 
I feel that using any living naturally grown thing for your own comfort could be deemed as not being kind to living things. Like trees for furniture, fresh cut flowers in vases etc etc.
Not to mention the impact that the industrial or technological industries have on the planet which in turn affects animals in the wild and other human beings, but we don’t shout too hard about that. 
But vegans still buy electrical goods, furniture and eat plants. 

Plants are living things too, cutting them down or uprooting them is killing them. Just because we can’t hear them scream or measure their pain doesn’t mean we don’t kill them. This is the part where people will say I’m absurd for comparing the killing of an animal to the cutting of a plant. FYI this is to illustrate that either way you’re killing something. 
Obviously we have to eat so I am not saying we should not eat anything because we would have to “kill” it first. It’s all good and well but let’s be clear about the fact that making other people who are not vegans feel bad is a no no.
It’s not that simple! 
Becoming a vegan for me is about the barbaric act of raring, killing and waste that we humans partake in, and the impact on the environment everyday. 
The imbalance of over fed people who waste food versus starving people around the world is insane. It unnecessary and too much!
What has put me off enjoying meat is the thought of all I have mentioned above. It’s put a bad taste in my mouth. For me even eating organic free range meat still fuels the other 80% of barbaric bullshit that goes on. 
If the farmers around the world did it differently without creating suffering or damaging the environment then perhaps I would consider eating meat again. 

What vegans and non vegans have to realize that all the barbaric shit we do to this planet from littering to pollution hurts a living being in one way or another. So saying you feel at ease and making others feel bad is not in my option something to shout about. There are still animals and humans that suffer and or die as a result of all the other stuff you do that hurts the planet. 

So by all means continue to do the right thing but chill with the self righteousness and spread the message and love instead. 🙏🏽🌺



For those women who unfortunately have low self esteem or are working on a higher self esteem, dating can be challenging and heartbreaking. 
Being someone who had low self esteem and works everyday towards ridding myself of my previous beliefs about myself I know what I am talking about. 

Having this low self esteem when dating means that your need for love, attention and approval outside of yourself can be your kryptonite.  
If you don’t belief you are a Queen rather than a peasant when dating, any guy who comes along, that looks good enough and starts to tell you all you want to hear pushes you give yourself to him when he doesn’t deserve it. 

You are quick to give too much too soon. Or perhaps you make exceptions for what they lack because you don’t think you’ll get better, cause after all you’re “unlovable” “ugly” “worthless” to name a few. 
There are so many stunningly beautiful women who to others has everything, yet when those women look in the mirror they don’t feel they measure up or are good enough. 

You see these women with worthless men who have no business being anywhere near them but they sold themselves short because of their negative view of themselves. 
Now I know full well that snapping out of that “I am nothing” mentality is not easy and it takes time and in some cases hitting rock bottom to snap out of it. In the mean time you will date cause dating is nice and fun but what you must not do is settle for less than you deserve. 
So what do you do while your brain doesn’t cooperate with your soul? 

Well I believe that you date like a Queen! 
A queen doesn’t have to prove she is worthy and she doesn’t settle for less than what she deserves. 

My advice for staying away from making a huge mistake by getting into anything deep with the wrong man is to ask yourself this!

If I could choose any man on the planet to marry, would it be this guy? 

Now think and really think about it. 

If in your mind’s perfect world, where you were as thin, beautiful, rich, confident etc etc (FYI you’re perfect now) as you beat yourself for not being, would you choose to marry this man?

9/10 the answer will be no!
You are only thinking of giving your whole life to him because you don’t think you’ll find anyone who can make you feel special like he does. 
Now let’s all remember the times we met that guy, at first we were not sure but we kept talking to him cause he gave us attention. He told you all you wanted to hear and you loved it. 

You gave him the cookie too early cause you believed that would keep him, then you start you need him a little too much because he starts to pull back the compliments etc. he isn’t answering your messages as quickly as he used to, you start to stress that all your low self esteem fears are coming true. That he doesn’t want you anymore, that you are unlovable or fat or ugly or whatever. 

You start to act crazy and needy and start falling for the unattainable.  

And you do all this for a man that isn’t right. 

Then you suffer the pain heartbreak that you created for yourself and all because you don’t know how to be your all. 

It may be that you meet a great guy but your insecurities will make him look at you for what you believe you are. He wants a queen not a peasant. 
But he will never get to see the queen because of your fears. You can’t help it though, it’s how your brain works right now and you hope one day you can be that woman. And yes you will overcome this with help but in the mean time just ask yourself that question “IF I CAN CHOOSE ANY MAN ON THIS PLANET TO MARRY, WOULD I MARRY THIS MAN” so you at least save yourself time. 

Your time, neediness, body, craziness and all that would be better spent on someone you at least see yourself marrying and not some wasteman fuck boi! 

That’s my short cut to the problem while you work on becoming QUEEN! 

Good luck and message me if you have any questions. Much love ❤️



Last year September I felt like I needed a change.

This was following on from a year of self-discovery, many ups and several downs.

I wanted to take control of my well-being, stop eating badly and put goodness in my body.

I imagined how happy my stomach and body would feel if all I gave it was great healthy and nutritious food. I knew one of my friends Claira Hermet was a vegan and she seemed to be doing okay, so I decided to look into veganism and the kind of foods I would be eating. I discovered that I would need to cut out all dairy, meats and fish.

Before I embarked on it, I decided to talk to Claira about it and we made plans to have lunch at one of her favourite vegan restaurants in London called Mildreds.

I got to Mildred’s early, so sat down and got some coffee and olives while I waited for Claira.

I didn’t know what to expect as I sat down and looked at the menu. The menu looked very foreign to me, because I am so used to looking for delicious fish or shellfish dishes when attending good restaurants.

I tried to look for dishes that had any of my favourite ingredients but nothing jumped out at me, so I decided to look around me and see what other people were eating. The food look great and I made a mental note of some of them so I could ask the waiter later.

Claira turned up and we talk about her views on veganism. She asked me why I wanted to do this and I told her. She responded telling me that just wanting to be healthy is great but I should think about what animals go through before we eat them. She explained that she is very much into good energy and the bad energy embodied in the animals as they are slaughtered was something she did not want in her body. I thought that was interesting and decided I would spend time looking into how the animals we eat are slaughtered.

We then looked at the menu together and she recommended the falafel burger which I ordered. It was delicious and you could hardly tell that there was no meat in it. It gave me some hope that becoming a vegan would not be that hard after all. I also realized that with my great cooking skills I could make anything taste great. So that was the day I decided to become a vegan.

Later that evening on my way to my sister’s house I decided to buy some food from the local chip shop because I was hungry. I ordered a small chips and a chicken burger. I was very preoccupied with my thoughts of me and Claira’s trip to Paris the following week, so I wasn’t really present so to speak.

Not until having eaten almost all of it did it hit me that I had previously that day made a decision not to eat meat. I laughed at myself because I felt very foolish. I told my sister and her fiancé about what happened and they couldn’t help but roar in laughter too.

I did feel bad but I didn’t beat myself up, I just told myself that I had to make sure that I stay present and follow through with my decision.

Now the big hurdle to face as a new vegan is going to Paris without eating my favourite steak with peppercorn sauce or mussels. I then started to um and ah about whether I should start when I get back from Paris, but Claira advised me to stay strong and that I could do this.

We went to Paris had a fab time but I did eat my steak and poor Claira bad to sit there and smell it all.

Most of the time I ate vegan dishes and the first vegan restaurant we went to just blew me away. What I found very surprising is how many vegan restaurants there were in Paris. I would never have expected the French who are meat and cheese lovers to have that many, but they did!

Spending time with Claira and seeing how committed she was really inspired me. I decided that when I get back I will do this and I did. I stuck at it for about 4 weeks.

In the 4 weeks leading up to me eating animals again, I had several conversations with people about what I was doing. Everyone had an opinion on the matter which is expected. I talked about how much I miss eating fish and that perhaps I need to stop eating meat but keep eating fish. Many people agreed with me and also told me that I was making my life hard for no reason.

My mother was the least supportive, being from Africa eating meat was a big thing. They hardly had access to an abundance of meat and she attributed her family’s weakness, illnesses and deaths to not eating enough protein. Living with someone who did nothing but complain about your diet is not easy.

Anyway she made my favourite Ghanaian meal which consisted of deep fried fish, kenkey and hot pepper sauce. I couldn’t contain myself and I ate so many fried fish and practically made up for the previous 4 weeks.

I then proceeded to eat other meats and so on. I went from being a full time vegan to a part time one.

This is still the case but I still don’t beat myself up because I am learning so much about myself. This was

and is a huge life decision and I needed to learn to do it for reasons that were right to me.

What I came to learn is that without an emotional attachment to all animals or truly seeing the suffering they go through in order for us to eat them I would never become a full time vegan.

I mentioned my struggle to a good friend Carl Macphail and he told me to watch a documentary called cowspiracy. I did and it open my eyes up to the damage we are doing the planet with intense farming.

I was shocked and decided to look into animal welfare and farming, it led me to a film called Earthlings and I will never forget the feeling of disgust I felt towards human kind and how we treated other species for our own selfish needs.

It’s not that eating animals is bad, of course not but it’s how we go about it. Animals eat each other in the wild but they don’t intensely farm other animals so they could have more meat than needed.

They don’t stock tones of meat in supermarkets only to throw most of it out because it has hit its expiry date.

They don’t rape the planet for cheap feeding methods for the animals we intensely farm. They eat what they need and that’s it.

After watching this I could not bring myself to eat meat or fish for a few weeks, but again I told myself that if I ate meat that was slaughtered correctly, or meat that was organic and free range then surely I am not contributing to what’s wrong with the world. Now this mentality is perfectly fine and I think that if you are going to eat meat that’s the way to go. So that’s what I did, I carried on being a part time vegan.

As time went by and I would read up more and more about meat, the human body and diseases, I came across a Dr Sebi who claims to cure everything from aids to cancer by using his eating methods and his tonics. Dr Sebi talks about how eating meat makes the body acidic which in turn is a perfect environment for excess mucus and disease. He recommends an alkaline diet (for more about this just google Dr. Sebi).

I also spent a great deal of time talking to my friend Carl who is a vegan and very knowledgeable on alternative medicines and health. All this information started to sink in and you could say my subconscious mind and my soul were doing their thing in the background.

I have recently noticed that I struggle to ingest meat. It doesn’t feel right in my mouth, I have completely given up pork just because the idea of them not sweating and their eating habits makes me want to throw up.

Beef doesn’t taste right either any more. I recently went out to a dinner party where there was the most expensive cuts of beef on the table and it looked nice but every bite felt like I was eating leather. All I could taste was leather, I didn’t enjoy it at all. I did however enjoy the scallops and calamari.

This was two week ago and each time I have been in a position to eat chicken or beef I basically don’t want to because I know what it will taste like.

Chicken and beef do not taste like they used to any more, that sweet taste I remember loving is now replaced by what I can only imagine death tastes like.

I have also now created an emotional attachment to all animals where I feel physically sick when I think of any animal suffering. I remember reading somewhere that you are truly a conscious vegan when you see yourself in animals or empathize with them.

These days I can’t look at pet cats and dogs and not wonder how humans can choose which types of animals they love and care for when they are all equal. That train of thought leads me to think about how black African slaves were treated like animals because they were different. We are doing the same things to animals and it’s cruel.

I do think that it is okay to eat animals if that’s what you want to do, but eating the ones who suffer just so we can buy cheap meat from supermarkets or restaurants is very wrong. I feel raping the planet we all share to supply cheap meat is wrong. All this can be done differently and it doesn’t have to be like this. I am not saying everyone should be a vegan, I feel this is a personal choice.

I personally can no longer eat animals just because I have created an emotional attachment to them and I see their souls, I feel their souls and meat no longer taste as sweet as it used to. When I chew on meat I am very aware of what I am chewing and very aware of the taste in my mouth and I don’t like it. It

reminds me of a stale mouth after waking up from a long sleep while being ill with flu.

So I am choosing to become a full time vegan from this day forward and I have a very good reason as to

why I am doing it. I am not just doing it because I want to be healthy, of course that is important but I am doing it because it feels right.





When I first saw you all I felt when I looked at you was the colour black.

Everything about you was harsh and dark. 

Then I read your words one by one.

Suddenly the dark clouds broke letting in the sun. 

It was just enough sun for me to wonder. 

Wonder what was beneath this iron sculpture. 

The curiosity lead me to get to know you.

I was nicely surprised and my heart flew. 

Determined you came for me and I didn’t have a clue. 

You had plans for me, if only I knew. 

I may have allowed myself time. 

Time feel all your colours before crossing that line. 

I didn’t realise that your colours were painted on. 

You were too broken from the island storm. 

You didn’t have to be strong. 

Showing who you are isn’t wrong. 

Perhaps I would have understood.

I would have been patient and seen the good. 

But I run 

Oh Yes I run,

Run as far away as I could so I wouldn’t see you when I looked back. 

But no matter where I went your sun still shone through your black. 

Like a moth to a flame I’m pulled back in

It seems the space allowed me to see through the burning paraffin. 

No Amount of smoke or paint can detract from who you are. 

And that’s a beautiful broken star. 

A star would capture the eye of Renoir. 


When you have been brought up believing you are nothing or unlovable or a second class citizen or beneath anything good you become someone who gets overly excited when someone tells you things that are the opposite of all the negative beliefs you have. 
You become someone people can easily use and discard when their needs change. 

You become someone who attracts users full stop. It just seems to go hand in hand that way. 

You are constantly hurt by people’s actions because “how could they” you will say. 

You become a people pleaser, someone that bends backwards for people because you want praise and acceptance or love. 

You become everything you are trying to get away from and in turn reinforce your childhood beliefs. 
You must force feed yourself with affirmations and build a self image that conveys all the things you want to hear from other people to make you feel good. 
You must know 100% that yes you are amazing, special, beautiful, kind, loving and all the other stuff most people want to hear and feel from another person. 

So when a special person comes into your life telling you these things you will not become addicted to hearing them because you are already those things. 

You will therefore never have blinkers on when the wrong person comes along making you feel special. 

That’s how the wrong people get their hooks into you. They tell you what you want to hear and you buy into it and more. 
This is related to self love and knowing your worth. Know them and you will never feel any of the negative things you were brought up to believe. 
Now how do you incorporate this into your life?
Start by writing down all the things you want to hear and feel from a partner or freind. 

Then get yourself dressed up as though you are going out or work or on a date, basically as nice as you can to make you feel great. 
Stand in front of a mirror and read out the list of things out loud by saying for example “I am beautiful” “I am amazing” etc. 

Spend at least 10 minutes repeating them over and over. Don’t rush through them. 

Feel every word and feel every emotion that comes with it. 

Make sure you have eye contact and try to look deep into your eyes. 
Do this everyday for the rest of your life. Even if you are with someone you should still do this everyday. 
There will be days where you don’t feel like dressing up or looking your best that’s fine. Just get up and get in front of that mirror and talk to yourself and tell yourself those things. 

No matter how hard it is you do it and you use all the positive emotion you would use if you were saying it to someone else and use it on your self. 

Your list may change over time that’s fine, either add to them or remove things from them. 
You then need to decide what and who you want to become. 

This can take time and you will need help. 

I would recommend starting with getting cognitive behavioral therapy to work out how your mind thinks and understanding where those negative self beliefs came from. 

Once you know why you are “broken” you can then start building a new self image. You can start deciding who and what you want to be based on your new set of beliefs. I will write more about this in my next blog. 
Being a broken person never goes away. It’s a daily battle to find the balance between being selfish and selfless.

Knowing when not to give too much of yourself away because of fear of not being wanted, appreciated or loved. 

But you can become aware and you can give yourself the best beginning of your new self, your self loving self. 
In time you will recognize straight away people who are wrong for you. You will chose friends that add to your life rather than use you. 
You will never have an interaction that leaves you feeling empty because you compromised your needs. 

You will not make bad situations or people work because you feel you need them. 

You will stand up for yourself. 

You will be enough for you and when the right people come into your life you will be able to enjoy them without fear. 

Written by Sarah Martin 



I’ll wear my tight black dress. 

I’ll have on my 3″ heels. 

My lips will be painted red. 

My lashed will be long and fluttering. 

My hair perfectly curled and styled. 

My nails long and sexy. 

I’ll take the perfect selfie. 

I’ll post it with some logical caption. 

I’ll get lots of likes and comments. 

I’ll be told that, hot, beautiful, sexy and I’m that fantasy!

All this effort and likes and comments he my external appearance should be flattering,


I write a poem or an article or create a quote to express my inner beauty and my soul, and I get hardly any likes and hardly any comments as I would if I had my ass out or dressed up. 
It doesn’t bother me one bit but it saddens me that society is so preoccupied with what looks beautiful rather than what is beautiful. 

We miss depth, meaning and the wonders of real life because we are blinded by everything fake! And cannot comprehend that after all the glamming up you still have to live with who you are, the real you. 

We spend so might money on the external and nothing on the internal. 

It seems fake is the new real!

What a damn shame.